El Paso, TX (TWP)
An El Paso High School teacher of 17 years married the superintendent’s new paradism in a civil ceremony performed at the Little Pink Chapel of People’s Church on Friday at 3:50 p.m.
The teacher, Raul Montoya, remarked, “Another new superintendent and another new paradigm–the sixth in 10 years–I figured I’d just marry the fucker this time and get some alimony when she ran away next year.”
In attendance at the wedding were several of Montoya’s colleagues, all of whom expressed their support for Montoya’s nuptials. Best man Dirk Grambling offered the bookmark that sealed the ceremony when Montoya said “I do” to the paradigm decked out in a bright blue and red paperback called Shifting the Paradigm: Schools that Work with Wonder.
After placing the bookmark inside the never-read book, Montoya and the paradigm were officially wed. After a few glasses of champagne, Montoya was overheard saying, “This is one time I’m staying a virgin. That spine will never be cracked!” A toast by the teachers went rapidly around the Pink Chapel’s church or meeting room room.
New superintendent Balthazar Poteet declined to comment.